


To Begin Again

by cero_ate



Series: Comfort from Strange Places [2]
Category: Captain America (2011), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Bodyswap, De-aging, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Loki's mind is a bag of cats., M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-12
Updated: 2012-07-12
Packaged: 2017-11-09 19:43:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/457670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cero_ate/pseuds/cero_ate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki decides how to collect on his bargain with Bucky.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Begin Again

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Pervyficgirl for the beta

When he’d gained the one-armed assassin, Loki had thought long and hard about what he wanted most. What he needed most, what that brat could provide him. Again and again Loki’s mind twisted, wondering what it was that let Bucky give of himself for the other mortal that easily. What led them to find each other, time and time again. No matter what they went through, they found each other. Loki wondered what that would be like. To lose and find and lose and find anew. To be loved the way they loved each other, to be that self-sacrificing.

He could think of no Aesir who retained that quality. His brother was loving, but Loki knew that he could no more wish Loki whole than he could wish the sun to shine on the dark side of the moon. But the Captain had done just that for his little Shadow-assassin. Who was not denigrated for not  
meeting the enemy on equal ground, but lauded for his skills for trickery. The Captain was not teased for his weak devotion to artistry either. What made them two of the most respected warriors Midgard had, even with those faults?

Loki studied the two long and hard, unable to find out the reasoning, and watched the way they interacted with each other. What better way to observe their methods to gaining respect than to do so as part of their family. He knew he would not be able to gain access to that as the man he was.

He was so tired. In all honesty, and he did try to practice honesty to himself if no other, he was exhausted and ready to fade away as the Gods of other pantheons had. Fade into nothingness. Even his feud with Thor had palled of late. It was the same dull fight.

Finally he made his decision, penned the letter, remembering to use English, as Odin help them if they needed Thor to translate. He waited for the appropriate time and performed the spell.

It was a long ritual, from dusk until dawn and there was no surety they would work. It was as much a pliant to higher powers than himself as it was a spell. But if this succeeded… He barely allowed himself to hope, to wish that the transformations would take. They were the most painful things he’d ever experienced and he could feel himself fading, not into the abyss but…something far more permanent feeling even as his flesh twisted, and rent, becoming what he used to be, swapping the now for then, the here for there. He could feel himself almost detach and return to something different and yet something remembered faintly. He exchanged his body and mind for a younger version. He would start again. He could hear screaming only to realize it was himself that was doing it. 

Bucky opened the door to see a small black haired child at the entrance.

“Mr Barnes?” the child lisped. “This is for you.” 

Bucky took the envelope and just barely restrained himself from cursing. Steve would have the biggest fit at teaching little Loki bad habits right from the start.

“I told you this was going to bite your ass,” Steve murmured into his ear, and knelt down. “Come on in, son.” 

Steve held open his arms and the small Loki hesitantly walked into them for a hug. Bucky sighed and knelt down to hug him as well, trying to ignore all the arguments they’d had on whether Loki was evil or just needed more hugs growing up. Looked like they were going to find out.

“Welcome home,” Bucky told the kid. “We’re gonna need to clear out a bedroom for you.” 

The tiny kid smiled. Shit, he was smaller than Steve had been. No wonder the Frost Giants had decided he was a runt. Bucky hugged him again, and was relieved that this was how Loki had decided to collect his debt. Crazier than a bag of cats but…who else would decide to swap their bodies and mind and move in with a couple of old bachelors? Why he hadn’t picked Thor who at least was his brother…. Oh well. He’d promised and he would come through. Besides, this kid needed some them. And neither of them could turn away a child in need. They would have helped the adult too, come to that.


End file.
